After running into Guinevere in that strange Nexus place I thought I would be free of any bizareness at least for a while.

I spoke too soon, obviously, because today while I was out looking for a lavender plant? Bush? Tree? I ran into that female Merlin again.

Now, I'm always calling Merlin a girl's petticoat, but really, I don't need to see him as a girl, that's just frightening.

Not to mention she's still...somehow...my servant, why would I want a girl servant?! How is that even allowed? I'd certainly have trouble sleeping if I knew a woman was going to come when morning does!

I'm sure Gwaine wouldn't mind however...

I don't know what the Hell is going on lately...everything is just...nothing makes sense at all!

Like today, I thought for one brief moment that Father had suddenly recovered.

But no, it was just...I'm not entirely sure who it was...some sort of 'actor'? I don't know, but I can tell you it certainly wasn't Father.

I really don't need any more of this, can't things just go back to normal?

I think I saw the future today...

Or maybe it was just the heat?

Either way I saw Morgana, or a Morgana at least.

And she was ill, very ill, worse than Father either.

I have no idea what to make of it...it's not as if I can help her, even though I really want to she can be found.

Maybe she'll run into herself and learn just what's waiting for her if she doesn't-, God only know what she'd make of that.

I'd almost like to see it.

Yes... although I suppose if I ever have trouble sleeping there's a surefire cure for it.

Merlin came and woke me up, which was rather good of him. Although I thought I was ill...I can't keep up with him, I swear!

I had a very odd encounter with a Merlin today actually...earlier on. I saw A Merlin because I'm quite sure he wasn't my one. At first I just thought he was delirious. But apparently not.

It was somewhat unsettling...though nowhere near as bad as that evil Merlin...I'm never going to get over that one.

Anyway, the reports won't read themselves sadly, so I better get back to them, the delegation from Moira arrives tomorrow... I hope I can survive this. Moira and Camelot haven't had a meeting of this nature in years. I just pray they don't think just because Father is indisposed they can make unreasonable demands.

This multiverse, I get that strange Druid child - Mordred thrown at me.

But he seems to be under some sort of...misunderstanding. Quite a disturbing one, I don't even want to write it down!

But really, can't a man even go hunting in peace anymore?

I may as well have brought Merlin along!

Except for the raging inferno I encounted!

And if that wasn't enough when I managed to sort that out. I headed towards Guinevere's cottage to see here and instead found a...male Guinevere...

A Guinevere who's...a man. That's so...I don't even...

Sometimes I think this Nexus is trying to drive me mad.

It's not going to happen! So Guinevere is a man in one of these other universes, she's still her here.

Having said that...my Guinevere is a very good blacksmith...Leon mentioned to me how she created a copy of the dungeon key to break him out.

The feast prepration are coming along, all the seating charts are still around so I don't need to worry about having to put Sir Kevin next to Lady Juliana thus causing some sort of food throwing incident.

And sadly...the talks are starting up again tomorrow morning, early, so I have no choice but to turn in now. It's hard enough not to sleep through them all ready!

Well, the feast last night was quite the success. Although I think I enjoyed the mead far too much...how else can you explain me seeing Morgana - the old Morgana, before Morgause did...whatever it is she did to her and a Guinevere who was in the middle of her wedding celebrations, our wedding celebrations.

I wonder what my Guinevere would say if I brought that up.

Anyway, I woke up this morning, well noon actually, I had a pounding headaching. Not surprising I suppose...but very bad luck for me, I have to make the closing speech for the Beltane festivities!

Fortunately Gaius prepared a draught for me to take at lunch and I'm confident I can give the speech in a few hours - at midnight.

Although, it's going to be a very short speech, I really have no idea what to say...still! Hopefully I'm not going to have to endure hearing Monmouth's comment on that, maybe he just won't notice.

Miracles happen sometimes.

Or thing, at least.

Today after I left Father I went to the Council Chambers to prepare for a meeting where I found...

Father.

But he really wasn't himself.

Obviously that multiverse thing was playing tricks, a rather cruel trick all things considered. It was another him...from another time. But he was only as tall as my dagger! He'd been shrunk!

The strangest thing of all was he was just like he used to be, before...all this happened.

In all honesty? I found myself wishing he was Father, my one I mean.

But no, he was still in his chambers, quiet and mute as ever.

I don't even want to write about anymore...

The competitors didn't stay for long, some of them have such a long trip home I suppose it isn't too surprising. The barman at the Rising Sun was standing in the doorway looking like he'd just been punched in the gut. He tried to convince a few of us to come in for a drink or two, something about it being the only thing that would keep him from poverty.

Needless to say we did not take him up on the offer, at least not right then, I think a few of the knights might still be down there.

I meanwhile returned to the castle to find myself face to face with Vivian!

At least that's what I thought for a minute or two (and believe me, it was horrifying), but no it was a future person...and a look-a-like. I pity the poor soul who ends up with Vivian, but someone must, if she has a decendant. She was a lot nicer than Vivian I'll say that much, centuries must have fixed some of the worst traits.

After that, I found myself stumbling into the Nexus again, where I met up with April who seemed upset. I think I might have cheered her up a bit at least.

So, council meetings start up again tomorrow, which means I have hours of boredom to look forward tomorrow.

Definitely no more pagentry.

I have to wonder if I just dreamed the last few days.

Yesterday, I dueled with my father, and well...I had to lose. I mean, obviously...I wasn't going to because...who wants to lose? It was embarrassing! Really, really embarrassing. After meeting with Guinevere in the tent I decided that I'd fight at my full skill and let the result fall where it would. It's the knightly thing to do after all.

But well...it's not like when I was a child and I used to dream of going up against my father and winning - Morgana's father used to let me win, it took me forever to figure that one out. But yes, Father would never fight with me, he took duelling seriously...VERY seriously. Which I suppose makes sense when you consider Uncle Tristan.

But anyway, I was out there on the tournament field and more than able to defeat him, not that he wasn't good - I have to make that clear, even if no-one reads this. It's not as if he was absolutely useless out there. Frankly I think I made a rather good showing of losing without...losing obviously.

And of course he was insufferable about it. Honestly! The gloating that man can do! If there was a tournament for that he'd win hands down.

It didn't help that about five minutes after 'losing' I realised the rather unpleasant fact that Father was to fight in the final. Who was he going to be up against? It was either this rather talented knight from the East or...I'm not sure who he was, a boy from the country, Billy, Willie? I wasn't paying attention really. On the face of it I thought, Father's chances would be better with the boy, I mean, he's was all scrawny, reminds me of Merlin really. But then again, he HAD killed someone in the tournament.

Anyway, scrawny or not, this Billy or Willie or whoever, is very impressive, really, if I'd been able to get hold of him afterwards I would have invited him to join the guards.

He lost though, I think it was just brute strength that got Father through, skilled fighter or not someone as scrawny as that didn't really have a hope.

So! Father is the Champion, for another ten years...and if he decides to compete next time, I'm not going to show him any mercy.

And he knows it, because he knows I lost purpose. Really, I didn't think he would he was so busy gloating (really it was embarrassing to watch), but no.

I was expecting him to...well...I don't know, tell me off? Go on how disappointed in me he was? But no...he was grateful! Actually GRATEFUL that I hadn't embarrassed him. I've never seen Father grateful before.

And he told me he'd watch my training, through all the years...I never knew. I thought he didn't even care. But he knew everything about it, every little thing. I can't believe he never bothered to tell me! I don't even...

So yes... very strange...

And then it got stranger, because this...Nexus likes to hit a person when them down.

I ran into a very familiar lady, but not familiar...Because I'd never seen her before.

She was me of course, a FEMALE me, why does this sort of thing happen? It's disturbing!

But not as disturbing what happened next, oh no, I'll probably have nightmares about that...I ran into Merlin. But not as I know him. He was an HER!

I don't even...

A girl Merlin...I mean...I've told him that before, but...it's quite different seeing him, her like that.

I'll never dream peacefully again...possibly...

At least I assume this is who is behind this.

I've still got the accent. In fact it might even be thicker! Pretty soon I won't be able to speak at all!

Thanks to the Guinevere I met the other day (the other one, not my one) I managed to get out of all the Council Meetings today by notifying my father of the necessity of going to check the border, with all the tournament competitiors coming and the Tournament being so distracting... Well, it'd be a rather good time for Cenred to make attacks.

As it turned out, he wasn't (frankly, I think he's rather an idiot), but it kept me from talking to anyone, except for Morgana. I've managed to avoid speaking to Merlin!

But I've also been bereft of Guinevere's (my Guinevere this time) company. This depresses me more than I can say. I'm sure even with this stupid accent she'd understand me, she always does!

I will seek her out tomorrow, accent or no accent..even though I'll need Merlin's help, of course, he better not go on about this. Otherwise...I might just enter him in the Tournament.

Speaking of which, it begins on Tuesday - which is Father's birthday in honour of the fact he's the previous champion.

So to bed, tomorrow will be filled with training! And Guinevere if I'm lucky.

I've never prayed so hard in my life and it actually worked, it never has before... But I guess...

Well, Guinevere's safe! She's been released, I've held her in my arms and it's all because of some senile old man.

This day could have been less shocking, however...firstly, it finally happened, I ran into a Guinevere who looks like my Guinevere, but is not. Not one who doesn't look like her...or even one from the future like a Morgana I also ran into.

I finally found my Guinevere and well...the world was right again.

As for Father....I will never look at him the same way again, I can't imagine ever forgiving him for this. Ever.

But now I'm thinking about that senile old sorcerer...his execution is set for tomorrow, I really don't know if he even understands what's happening. Which is an uncomfortable feeling...which is why I've decided to go and see him. Even if he did knock me out and insult me.

If he is senile, he should hardly face execution should he? I have to know.

An honourable knight Prince Arthur has gone to the aid of a gentleman in need.

The fact that the gentleman in need just happens to be a look-a-like is purely coincidental.

Because I think he is making life very difficult for Guinevere, and that's the last thing she needs.

Today I ran into her while she was carrying laundry, which is not an uncommon thing...she dropped the laundry however, a less common thing. And she practically jumped out of her skin before she realised it was me! Obviously Sir Ioan is following her around and making her jump at every shadow.

No-one should be following Guinevere around but me - not that I do...I'm just saying is all.

Anyway, I helped her with the clothes, because she just kept dropping things...and I have to say, I'm glad I did.

I have to remember, there's a very nice alcove in that hallway...

And I'm intrigued! In the future there's a whole day dedicated to proclaiming one's love.

Hmmm....possibilities...

Gwaine I mean, I ran into him, or at least who I thought was him just after training this afternoon.

Turned out to be some other person entirely. And that's just strange. Does it mean that Gwaine will eventually have heirs and then ancestors? I can't see him being the sort to settle down.

And this look-a-like didn't seem to be the least bit like him aside from the hair.

I'm making some calculations here...so far there's been look-a-likes for Father, Morgana, Merlin, myself and now Gwaine! I wonder if there's look-a-likes of the rest of the knights out there. So odd...very odd.

I'm sure I'll have weird dreams tonight...

I don't even... I can't even...

WHAT?!!

I spoke too soon, this morning I woke up (or rather Merlin woke me up in that inadominantly way he has) to discover the place covered with snow.

Damnit.

So there won't be any training or hunting, not even if I was sure Merlin had figured out how to use the stick properly.

So instead I just wandered about the castle, I even chanced going outside for a few moments.

Where I ran into one of those look-a-likes, he was in rather bad shape.

Which was a pretty odd sight. Do I really look that bad after a beating? It's really not very attractive. I should look into that...

Not that I get beaten up often of course, but a prince always needs to look his best.

It is! I've found yet another person who looks like me, but isn't me, not even a from the future me!

And he can cook? I don't know what to make of this! Maybe I should ask him for lessons? If only because maybe I'd learn better from myself?

Speaking of look-a-likes, I met that interesting lady, Igraine, who was pondering a very serious question, and despite realising she was not Morgana - she doesn't have the accent - I had to say something witty.

But then it got rather serious...she brings up some interesting points that I haven't thought of before, but do bare thinking about.

But...really at this time of night I perfer to think of Guinevere - not in THAT way (only sometimes), just in general. It guarantees good dreams and restful sleep!

And since I've decided to risk training tomorrow, that's something I need.

Although I shouldn't act like it's the end of the world...it's only a cold, but really, she shouldn't have been at work today!

Do the servants get sick pay? I must look into that...

I was actually...rather glad to be distracted by Guinevere, because earlier today I discovered...she wasn't a dream.

The...ghost Morgana I mean...it's really true, somewhere...in some universe Morgana died...was killed even and now is a ghost. A very lonely ghost. But she seems happier now that I'm around, apparently other Arthur's have been treating her terribly, and neither of us can figure out why. She's a bit different from my Morgana though...apparently she's magical (I don't know what to make of that...except I shudder to think what might have happened to her had Father found out) and related to...of all people, Morgause. Just writing all that down makes me realise why I thought I was imagining things!

But as I said she's real enough, for a ghost I mean. But either way I want to help her out. And if I ever find her Merlin, I'll have to kill him. He killed her!

And frankly I don't want to think too much about that.

Because my hands are purple, PURPLE!

It's all because of Guinevere's gift, I'm getting her something from the heart...personally made and able to be used by someone in her position.

And purple is her favourite colour, so...

So I have purple hands! And I have no idea how long they'll be like this! Yule is in three days and there will, of course, be a great feast to mark the occasion. I certainly can't wear gloves to a feast!

Morgana better not find out about this...she'd never let me live it down.

Speaking of which I met that strange girl, Igraine again - Morgana's daughter from another place. The multiverse continues to be bizarre...many of the names are familiar, but the personalities and background? Merlin the old wise sorcerer?! I may have trouble keeping a straight face next time I see him.

I suppose I should see if I can find something in the kitchen to get this purple dye off. Surely there has to be something - there's all sorts of things in a kitchen, some of which stain, I'm sure. So...yes...

Wish me luck book. If you in fact can.